Why Do I Find My Mother-In-Law So Annoying? (11 Reasons Why)

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Isabelle O'Gallagher

Isabelle O'Gallagher is a personal development and relationship expert who has consulted for some of the biggest companies in America.

When you get married, your spouse might have two parents that are your relatives. One of those new relatives is your mother-in-law – a family member that causes controversy.

You might be in a happy, healthy relationship with the love of your life. So – why do you find your mother-in-law so annoying? Is there anything that can make it stop?

Why Do I Find My Mother-In-Law So Annoying?

1. It’s Hard to Let Go

It can be tricky for your mother-in-law to let go of their child. After all, they raised them. It might be weird to hand them over to you – they’ve been a mother for so long.

It can be annoying to see your mother-in-law treat your spouse like a child. The best way to help them through this stage is to communicate and give your mother-in-law time to heal.

It might also help to sit down with your spouse and mother-in-law to determine what’s happening. This action will keep you all on good terms throughout the process.

2. Mediating Feels Natural

Does your mother-in-law try to fix your arguments? It might feel natural for her to take part in the troubles, which can be very annoying as you try to grow.

For your mother-in-law, stepping into the midst of chaos feels natural for the sake of her child. Be patient as you let her know that you have everything under control in your relationship.

3. There’s Another Parent

Now that you’re married, you have another parent. If you had troubles with your parents, tacking an additional parent to the mix can be an issue for your life.

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It’s critical to talk to your in-law about how it feels to have another parent in your life. They might parent you, but it’s likely not intentional. Mothers-in-law can be too parental.

If it’s too much, you might need to distance yourself from your mother-in-law. That’s an okay course of action as well.

4. Her Child is Always Right

Your mother-in-law might always take the side of her child, even if they’re not. This tactic can be infuriating and make you feel like the weaker person.

If you get in a fight and your mother-in-law always takes the side of your spouse, communicate with both of them. Ensure you are heard when arguments occur.

Your partner should be aware of the situation as well. They know their parents better than anyone and can help you navigate the communication process carefully.

5. She Enters Without Permission

Does your mother-in-law show up at your home and walk in without permission? This action can be infuriating for the average homeowner. It makes you feel like a child.

If your mother-in-law has not been given explicit permission or a key, talk to her about how the intrusion makes you feel. Hopefully, this annoyance can be sorted out with a few words.

If this action doesn’t stop, you can always change the locks on your house. It’s annoying to have your in-law invade, but it can also cross legal grounds.

6. Parenting Your Kids

Parenting Your Kids

You have your kids, and she is done raising hers. Many mothers-in-law try to step in and parent their grandkids as if they gave birth to them.

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It’s critical to remember that you are a parent, and at the end of the day, your kids know that. Still, it’s vital to communicate if she teaches items you don’t agree with in life.

7. She Hates Your Cooking

Cooking is a simple task that causes much distress. Your mother-in-law might criticize and make fun of your cooking, no matter how hard you try.

There’s no way around this hate except to be blunt. It’s your home, and you will cook what you want. She doesn’t have to eat with you.

If you love your mother-in-law with the annoyance, you guys can work out a food system everyone enjoys. Find food everyone can eat together without any complaints.

8. She Compares to Your Parents

Some in-laws want to think they are better than other peers. Your mother-in-law might compare herself to your parents and try to prove herself better.

If you find this action annoying, communicate to her about the annoyance. You can also talk to your parents about how she makes you feel and enlist them to help you get through.

9. She Wants You to Fail

Although rare, some mothers-in-law seek to cause relationships to fail. Unfortunately, this issue can be the case in many relationships. Some in-laws don’t like the spouses their children want.

You should act if you feel like your mother-in-law is attempting to destroy your relationship. Do therapy, talk to her, and strengthen your bond as soon as possible.

It can be annoying for a mother-in-law to attempt to break up a relationship – but it can also become dangerous for your relationship. Act as soon as possible for the best results.

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10. There is No Respect

You are now an adult. If your mother-in-law lacks respect and treats you like a child, it can be frustrating. Respect is a crucial part of any relationship if you want it to succeed.

Establish an adult relationship with your mother-in-law as soon as possible. You are a married adult, and you deserve to have that standing with your new parents.

11. She Has Control Issues

Does your mother-in-law walk into your home and tell you what to do? Control issues can be irritating to deal with in an in-law.

It can be tricky to handle control issues. It’s best to give your mother-in-law her way and talk to her when possible.

To know more, you can also read our posts on why parents are so entitled, why parents think they know everything, and why parents lie about Santa.


Even if you love your mother-in-law, it’s still possible for them to get on your nerves. They are family, and that’s what family does. They can be annoying as you roll through life.

From hating cooking to control issues, there are ways to find your mother-in-law annoying. Still, you can love her with all your heart simultaneously.


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